medium...hot...and...cold???

my whole day yesterday was just okay, nothing significant or whatsoever...

there were the downside of my times.....ok lang.....(hormones? )

got really fine when i talked to a friend who really listens, you know?

pro talaga naman...bad things happens for no reason at all...

or should i say, bad things happens when you least expect it...

haay nako talaga....

how can such a very good conversation turned out to be so terrible?!

kainis...with the rudenes and all! kainis na...nakakalungkot pa!

don't know, how could somebody just drop the conversation like that?

that's why, i really do believe in effective communication....

sometimes people just judge you right away without getting into the facts....

people are sometimes frustrating but i just can't do anything but accept them and let them be.

the harder i tried to reach out, the more they moved farther away from me.

or maybe, i'm just pushing myself too much....so, i just thought of drifting away from them.

no matter how much.... that's okay, i guess.... i'll just let the time do its own working.....

you can't really blatantly tell them who and what you are, anyways....so ....that's just about it....

my thoughts for this day? " patience is a virtue" & "in time, they'll realize who, what and how am i really at and/or for them"

it's just so hard to justify how truthful you are to a person ....nope... i shouldn't do that, coz i know myself too well....

maybe because, sometimes i don't consume myself in what they say to me either.

but, whatever it is, haay nako, i need not to be so naive......

...alone....

posted this at tristancafe.com site....got good feedbacks...tnx!

link: http://www.tristancafe.com/forum/42073#c1228970

sometimes it's so hard to imagine why people just use you. but, they said, God made you for them- those who are in need. i know, i can't truly savor the wonderful feeling of giving, if the one i'm helping doesn't really need my help. It's just so hurtful to see and accept that they could turn their backs on you, just like that, after they got what they wanted or they realized, they won't get anything from you anymore. now, i'm dealing with the reality of life, it's much harder and i can't help but remember my younger years where i don't have to think of anybody else except myself and my own happiness. i feel like, i have to be selfish sometimes but i can't. i keep telling myself that God made me for something or someone. the only thing that makes me going is learning that at the end of it all, even though, i didn't get any in return (so, i try not to expect anything back), people don't appreciate my existence and cares, people just take me for granted or worse, take advantaged of me, I still feel intact but weary (of course, that's part of it) coz i know, i did my part and pleased Him the best way I can.
i also thought that sometimes, i feel like i won't be able to give anything anymore but still, i'm trying to be there. they said, it's called stupidity or self-love doesn't exist in my being. but i thought, how could i love myself if i won't love somebody else? loving myself is loving someone. i won't be able to love myself, if i won't love the important people around me. i'll feel so damn empty if that will happen. i can't just go on with my life knowing that somebody is in despair. but sometimes, people don't want to accept things (just like me). so, all i can do is just respect that. and all i can do is to express my love through prayers. i do believe in DIVINE LOVE. i read about it and i know, it does exist and it does work. i just need to be patient and more loving. i need to love God more than anyone else. He's the source of everything---strength, love, thoughts, power, patience, understanding, etc... and from there, i know, divine love can be channelled to everybody. i have to love myself, i know that. and i do believe too, that loving God first, is also loving yourself in a way because you learn to love all His creations, and yourself included.

dream on

A very deep and intense kind of emotion, that even though no one’s uttering a single sweet word nor gentle, soft caresses which will send butterflies to your stomach, but just the mere presence of the person, is so greatly enough to make you feel so secured, loved and accepted……that’s what will soothe the longing, terrible pain and confusion.
And what if you’re not in the same plane? And what if the other person is looking for more than what your deep feelings are? Can you blame this person or yourself? Can you blame them if their state of passion can’t meet? So many questions……
It’s not how much you openly feel or totally give to a person that matters. It’s how you communicate your desires and understand the other’s flaws and shortcomings…..that’s why it is simply called LOVE.
I really don’t know…hmmm…can’t help but dream…someday….I know…someday…..
hmmm....I know, as what they would always tell me, no such thing ever exist! But, I do believe in working it out….”eagerly” working it out… whatever! I think, it’s time for me to stop. SMILE! That’s what I got from watching and reading too much so-called “perfect” love stories...no wonder, I don’t even watch TV nowadays!

i'm thinking and asking........

THINKING AND ASKING…....

loving without expecting any in return
caring and thinking without any response
until when can you stand all the hurt and pain?
is it called stupidity or simply loving purely?

when you think it’s already God-given
when you feel everything’s alright
in spite of all the flaws and disagreements
how could you really tell, when once so strong and now so weak?

do you have to settle for destiny?
or should you make way to live and struggle to be happy
they said if it’s God’s will it will be
but how could you really tell if you’re in the middle of insanity?

should you still love after all the misery?
or should you just keep it to yourself
and dream it’s still forever be
how could you really tell the future
once so bright and now so vague?

if you really love so honestly,
purity and togetherness once bound by unity
how could you really stand your love in pain
or how could you really enjoy life half-heartedly?

MY ANSWER? harharhar!!! ako din sumagot.....
give what they’d asked……you’ll be in pain (you have to go through it) but you’ll be happy later on with God’s love and guidance, you’ll never go wrong……..

this is cute

i'm an ocean! hahaha!!!

Video provided by Music Video Zone

You're An Ocean
(Fastball)

Can you make it easier for me to understand
How you're holdin' my heart
In your tremblin' hands
I say rise to meet me halfway up among the stars
You may be from Venus, but I'm definitely not from Mars

Chorus:
You're an ocean, you're an ocean
Settle down, settle down
What's the commotion?
I'm an island, but you're an ocean
It's a stormy sea of love and emotion
You've got me suspended motionless inside

Make the warm winds circle round my head just like you do
If I could do it, I could turn it to you
I believe I'd buy whatever you would sell to me
Nothin' in my life ever came with a guarantee

Chorus

I believe I'd buy whatever you would sell to me
Nothin' in my life ever came with a guarantee

Chorus

from tristancafe.com

GOODBYE
(JUANA)
ALBUM: MISBEHAVIOR

Didn't mean to hurt you badly
Don't think that I am fooling around with you
So sorry for the time you've wasted on me
So sorry for the things that you went through
But I know that the problem's within me
You're so nice but your love don't deserve me
Or maybe I'm just so scared to fall in love again

I can still remember the days
So many times, I've been hurt
So much trust I put on a relationship
So much suffering I got and the pain still remain
Know I like you but I don't wanna take the risk
So confused and I don't know how to deal with it
Need some time for awhile before I give my heart away

CHORUS
Don't say goodbye
Don't say goodbye
I need some time for awhile before I give my heart away

Don't say goodbye
Don't say goodbye
I need some time for awhile before I give my heart away

Now, I know I wasn't thinking before
That's why I'm always ending up with Mr. Wrong
Learning from the past, don't wanna make a mistake
You could be Mr. Right or could be a fake
You know I like you but I don't wanna take the risk
So confused and I don't know how to deal with it
Need some time for awhile before I give my heart away

[Repeat CHORUS]

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[Repeat CHORUS]